Jesus before the Sanhedrin, yet another kangaroo court

Christ before Pilate, Tintoretto

Here is a working translation of the statement on Jesus Christ, given to the press today by a spokesman of Peter, Prince of the Apostles:

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Peter agrees with the statements issued by the other followers of Jesus regarding the sentence of guilt in the first instance passed by the Sanhedrin.

This is painful news that, as we are well aware, has shocked many people, not only in Jerusalem. As already expressed on other occasions, we have the utmost respect for the judicial authority of the Jewish high priests.

Out of this respect, we await the outcome of the appeals process before Pontius Pilate, recalling that Jesus has maintained his innocence.

While awaiting the definitive judgement, we unite ourselves with all those feel victimized by his hard sayings, and reaffirm our commitment to do everything possible to provide a safe home for all, especially those who may feel unduly singled out by the challenge of Jesus' words and deeds.

In order to ensure the course of justice, Peter has confirmed the precautionary measures which all the followers of Jesus have already taken in fleeing the scene of his arrest in the Garden at Gethsemane. That is, while awaiting the definitive assessment of the facts by Pontius Pilate, as is the norm, Peter , like all the other followers of Jesus, is prepared to deny any connection to Jesus repeatedly, even as many as three times.

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The above satire attempts to follow line-by-line the antiseptic, lawyerly statement from the Vatican following a conviction of Cardinal Pell earlier this week of the sexual abuse of minors. It was a conviction based on evidence so flimsy that even Pell's enemies can't figure it out. My post yesterday was a lament: the bishops are so utterly cowed by the magnitude of the sexual abuse crisis that they can't speak up for one of their own. Where are the prayers for Pell?

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The Vatican's real statement on Pell: 

Here is a Vatican-working translation of the statement on Cardinal George Pell, given today in the Holy See Press Office, by its Director “Ad Interim”, Alessandro Gisotti:

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The Holy See agrees with the statement issued by the President of the Australian Catholic Bishops Conference regarding the sentence of guilt in the first instance concerning Cardinal George Pell.

This is painful news that, as we are well aware, has shocked many people, not only in Australia. As already expressed on other occasions, we have the utmost respect for the Australian judicial authorities.

Out of this respect, we await the outcome of the appeals process, recalling that Cardinal Pell maintains his innocence and has the right to defend himself until the last stage of appeal.

While awaiting the definitive judgement, we unite ourselves with the Australian bishops in praying for all victims of abuse, and reaffirm our commitment to do everything possible so that the Church might be a safe home for all, especially for children and the most vulnerable.

In order to ensure the course of justice, the Holy Father has confirmed the precautionary measures which had been imposed by the local Ordinary on Cardinal George Pell when he returned to Australia. That is, while awaiting the definitive assessment of the facts, as is the norm, Cardinal George Pell is prohibited from exercising public ministry and from having any voluntary contact whatsoever with minors.